Teaching Your Kids How to Share

Sharing is a hard concept for little ones. Why wouldn’t it be when some of the first words toddlers learn to say are “No” and “Mine”? 

Children are naturally self-centered and really believe that it’s all about them. So put these egocentric little ones together and you will begin to hear a lot of “I want that” or “I got that first.”

Teaching children to share is a challenge. To encourage playing together, it’s important to focus on the positive actions and reinforce what you want to teach: to share. Rather than start with a single toy, use blocks or Legos, and start by playing with them. Thank and praise them as they offer blocks to you. 

Children love it when they feel a part of making you smile. Focusing on their selfish behavior can make a small child feel bad for something they aren’t ready to understand.

There were times when my children could not share a toy together, so my husband and I would set a timer and each would get a turn with the desired toy. This also taught them to be patient because they knew that once the timer went off, it would be their time to play.

When friends would come over for a play date, sharing toys had a different challenge. I found that the issue wasn’t that they didn’t want to share but more about protecting some of their favorite toys. While it was important to teach my children to be hospitable, I also realized that they had a right to choose which of their toys to share. So before their play date would show up, they were given a choice to “hide” one of their toys.

Given the freedom not to share made them feel good and willing with what they did share.