Mr., Mrs., Ms.—Old Fashioned or Fashionable?

"Good morning, Mrs. Ricardo." 

"Good morning, Mrs. Trumbull. how are you today?" 

When is the last time you were greeted by someone using a title?   When is the last time you greeted someone using a title? 

I stopped by a Jamba Juice store over the weekend.  I knew it was early by the demeanor of the two young people working the counter.  After placing my order, the young man asked for my name. I paused for a moment, considering whether to say, "Mrs. Randall," but the I-wish-I-was-still-in-bed look on his face dictated that I go with the norm. So I said, "Rosalinda."  He quickly turned around and began stirring up my smoothie. 

As he handed me my order, I shared my deliberation. he smiled and replied, "That would have been cool."  I asked him if anyone has used a title. Gently shaking his head, he replied, "No." 

I believe it is comforting to young people to know that an adult is someone they can respect, someone they can turn to for advice, and someone they can count on.  

Can a title make a difference?

The most common reason I have heard adults give for not wishing to be referred as, Mr., Mrs., or Ms. is that it makes them feel old.  Well, maybe you are!  Be proud of the life and wisdom you have earned.  Be proud of the position you hold.  A little formality when you initially meet someone allows you to show your best, listen patiently and learn about the person by observing their mannerisms.   

Treating a newly introduced person as your new BFF can send the wrong message, especially in the business world where there is still a standard and time-honored protocol.  You may be perceived as insincere, unpolished and even disrespectful.  

Social Titles:

Young boys:  Master Kevin Johnson

Man:  Mr. Alex Johnson

Young girl:  Miss Sophia Johnson

Married woman using her husband's name:  Mrs. Timothy Johnson or Ms. Alicia Johnson or Mrs./Ms. Alicia Davino-Johnson

Married woman maintaining her maiden name:  Ms. Alicia Davino

Divorced woman :  Mrs./Ms. Alicia Johnson or Ms. Alicia Davino

Where do you stand?

Rosalinda Oropeza Randall is an etiquette consultant who owns Your Relationship Edge in which she teaches classes and presents workshops to a variety of audiences. She can be reached at rosalinda@yourrelationshipedge.com and her website is www.yourrelationshipedge.com. She can also be reached on Facebook.