Whining Allowed–Only Once A Year

In 1986, the Rev. Kevin Zaborney, designated Dec. 26, as National Whiner’s Day.  Zaborney founded the holiday in hopes of encouraging people to be thankful for what they have rather than unhappy about what they don’t have.

I thought about posting this yesterday, but I did not want to encourage whining.  There are enough days in the year that many of us individually proclaim as, "Whiner's Day." 

Truth be told, I am all for the occasional pity-party, venting and whining (call it whatever you want) to your significant other or, preferably, to a best friend who will call you on it when you need to snap out of it. However, if you are an eternal whiner, you may soon find that as you approach your confidant-of-the-day, they coincidently might happen to be running out the door every time. Or their cell phone might always have reception issues.   

Our whining affects those we whine to. It creates discomfort and sometimes places the listener in an awkward position. How? They may not agree with your point of contention but can't tell you for fear of causing you to spiral into a frenzy or, worse, accuse them of being against you.

In the workplace, it is even more detrimental for whiners. Stress and strain in your relationships will develop. They'll see you coming and want to run, hence, becoming unproductive and frustrated that they have to hide or create reasons to avoid conversations with you.

A workplace whiner loses credibility. They are looked upon as unproductive, a busy-body, discontent, incapable of handling situations, lacking confidentiality and a time-waster. Not only that, but it is highly unprofessional and unattractive to others.

Etiquette approach: What impression are you making to management who decides whether to promote you or not? It is rude to take up people's time with your whining and complaining. If you have a complaint, speak directly to someone who can make a difference. Be prepared with possible solutions. And, do not place blame on others. 

Next time: How to handle the workplace whiner.

Rosalinda Oropeza Randall is an etiquette consultant who owns Your Relationship Edge in which she teaches classes and presents workshops to a variety of audiences. She can be reached at rosalinda@yourrelationshipedge.com and her website is www.yourrelationshipedge.com. She can also be reached on Facebook.